Darksiders remaster name is PUN-ishable by death


The universe must be spying on me, because it was only yesterday that I commented on how cringe-worthy a pun Hilary Clinton made about Pokémon GO was and now news of this pundamental failure falls right into my lap. I know the universe isn’t known for pulling its pun-ches, but if this is my fault, then to everyone I say: I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.

So, Nordic Games have announced a remastered version of the 2010 action/adventure game Darksiders is coming to Playstation 4, Xbox One, PC and Wii U. The game focused on one of the four Horseman of the Apocalypse, War, trying to find out who set him up to bring about the end of days too early, and also spawned a sequel, Darksiders II. Both games were quite good from memory!

Now Darksiders II already got a remastered for Playstation 4 and Xbox One in October last year, and given it starred War’s brother Death, Nordic decided it would be fun to title the re-release Darksiders II: Deathinitive Edition. And you know what, it was fun, I’ll admit I had a chuckle. But now Nordic have tried to further their pun game with this new remaster and, uh, it has not worked out.

I’ll stop beating around the bush: they’ve called it Darksiders: Warmastered Edition.

Darksiders Warmastered

Look at it. LOOK AT IT.

That’s…that’s not a pun. At least “Definitive” and “Deathinitive” sound interchangeable, but “Remastered” and “Warmastered”? Hardly.

Nordic also posted some screens from the remaster, but they’re so low resolution it’s hard to see the improvement.

darksiders warmastered 2 darksiders warmastered 3 darksiders warmastered 1

As for the actual upgrades, Darksiders: Warmastered Edition will run in native 1080p at 60 frames per second for Playstation 4, Xbox One and PC but only 30 frames on Wii U. Improvements will be made to the post processing effects, shadow rendering and doubled texture resolutions.

No release date has been announced for the remaster, only a “coming soon” on the official page.

Send better War puns to Tom on Twitter: @tomdheath. Don’t forget to follow @load_screen and like us on Facebook.


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